Our paper family

An except from our dinner conversation tonight:

Duncan: I’ve got a job to do!

Daddy: What’s your job, buddy?

Duncan: My job is to cut paper.

Mummy: Oh, is Berry’s job to color on paper?

Duncan: Yes.

(This seems about right to me. After all, isn’t what each of us in the family does somehow related to paper?)

Mummy: Then it’s my job to write on paper. What’s Daddy’s job?

(Kevin says something totally unrelated to paper here — like it being Daddy’s job to water plants or eat bacon)

Mummy: I think it’s Daddy’s job to read paper! (I.e. the newspaper, textbooks for school, etc.)

Duncan: Yes. Now we can all like our jobs.

Then he asked me how my cut finger was healing and if it still hurt me. What a great kid. Especially compared to the meltdown monster we dealt with trying to leave a fun activity before lunch today. How does he go from one extreme to another so readily? And how did he know that one of his friends from school would be there, too?

Hugging trees makes children sleepy

The kids have been making us a little crazy lately, so we decided to try doing something new today. We went to visit the Cumming Nature Center in Honeoye Falls.

Our plan was several-fold:

• It’s an hour drive away — farther than we’d usually go for a hike in the woods, but this ate up 2 hours of our morning while our children were safely strapped into their car seats
• It would tire them out, so they’d nap (this has been an issue since the Binky Fairy visited Duncan 10 days ago)
• It’s outdoors — and we all could use more nature and tree hugging.

Speaking of tree hugging, when I see my children voluntarily go up to a tree and literally hug it — with no prompting or demonstration on my part — I know I’m doing something right as a parent. They do get outdoors to enjoy the natural world (as much as is natural in a city) a lot more than I do and I know that’s so important for them. At least if they’re on a playground or playing in our tiny backyard, they’re outside, and children can find the beauty and wonder of nature in anything. Often it seems to be in the rocks they insist on bringing home. Or the mulch they must repeatedly put on the bottom of the slides.

In any case, we managed to all get in the car and drive there without incident. Duncan actually fell asleep a few minutes before we got there. That’s what happens when you insist on waking up befor 6 a.m. We wandered around for a while, looked at a pioneer log cabin and read some signs about how the native Irondequoit used to live and then carried the crying, dragging little ones back to the car.

We found a diner for lunch. It was the first time I sent food back to the kitchen. I ordered a roast beef sandwich and my beef was green. Yes, green. Beef is not a vegetable. It shouldn’t be green. Amazingly, we finished lunch and packed everyone back into the car — where they fell asleep on the way home. We ran errands while they slept (Kevin stayed in the car with them, don’t worry! But we were out already and just used up 2 hours’ of gas) and got home with them still sleeping. I hung out with them and read in the car for a while until they each woke up.

It doesn’t seem like much of a fascinating day, and it was a lot of driving for a walk in the woods. Next time, we’ll pick somewhere closer to home and keep the hiking short. I’m glad that Berry is finally getting old enough to take on a walk like that, as I’ve always envisioned spending so much more time outdoors with the kids than I tend to actually do. It gives me hope for future weekend activities.

At lunch, we talked about our favorite part of the walk. Kevin saw a knarly tree that he liked, Duncan liked stepping on the tree roots. Berry — well, she’s 18 months old, she doesn’t give us much in the way of descriptive sentences yet. Me? I liked the part where we walked along a stream and all stopped and got quiet enough to hear the water flowing below us. There was stillness, suddenly, finally. I closed my eyes and could feel the woods around me and hear my own thoughts, finally given the space in my head.

Even after we got home and I was trying to decipher the TV show that Berry was asking me to put on, I looked in her eyes and she seemed different to me, somehow. Maybe we’d just spent some good time together. Maybe tromping around in the woods and hearing some stillness was good for her, too.

Going to a new church

At playdates this summer, a couple of my Mommy friends have talked about their church - book club meetings, Women’s retreats, that kind of thing. I miss going to church. Mostly I miss the fellowship, the healing that takes place, the communing with Spirit / God / Infinite Intelligence / the divine within each of us.

I asked them what it is they like about their church. The said they like the fellowship and knowing that they were working on their spiritual lives in some small way.

So today, after an invitation from one of those friends, I went.

Going somewhere new is always a bit of an uncomfortable experience. You’re out of your element, don’t know where anything is and worry about making some awful faux pas in front of strangers. Fortunately, one of my friends pulled up right behind me as I was parking and getting Duncan out of the car. So we followed them inside and they showed us around. I quickly got lost in the maze of this place.

The way the service works, everyone - parents and kids - sit down in the church for the first part of the service. Then the parents take the kids to their rooms for the remainder of the time. Duncan was in a 3-year-old pre-school room with his 2 playdate buddies and Berry went to the nursery with the siblings of Duncan’s friends. (Nice that we all had kids at the same time.) Then the adults go back to the service.

It all went well. Berry consented to being left and didn’t even notice me leave. I left my cell phone number and kept my phone on vibrate. Duncan got to play with his friends, so he didn’t care.

The service itself was fine. I have to say that I wish I liked it more. Because all the other things were really great - child care, my friends, a beautiful big building. But, while I do love Jesus, I just don’t have a Lord & Savior kind of relationship with him. I want to talk to God myself, directly, not through his son. Besides, we’re all God’s sons and daughters. To me, worshipping one person misses the fundamental point that Jesus was trying to convey to us all in the first place.

I will say that the hymn at the beginning of the service (not that I can name it, but it was a familiar tune from my childhood) made me start to cry. I was sitting there with two squirmy kids and no tissues - not the ideal time for an emotional religious moment. Besides, I hate to cry in public.

On the way home, I asked the kids if they liked it. Duncan said he did. He said he’d like to go again (i.e. he responded affirmatively when asked directly if he’d like to go again). Berry did not shake her head no when asked if she’d like to go again, which I will take to mean that she enjoyed it, too.

When asked what he did, Duncan told me that he “sang songs and played games.” Apparently the teaching was something about Moses. On the way out of his room, he was handed a “Take-Home Sheet” entitled, God Calls Moses, that has a coloring activity, a bit of bible teaching and an explanation about the whole thing (presumably for me). Which is a bit of an issue for me.

While I’m quite able to sort out my own personal beliefs from those of the person in the pulpit, I’m not sure I’m ready for my kids to be exposed to Presbyterian religious doctrine. On the other hand, I want them to grow up with something. The silly thing is, one of the main reasons we don’t go to my church - the one in which I am an ordained minister - is because they don’t have childcare. So either I leave them at home (with their Dad), hire my own sitter, or don’t go.

I think I’ll go to my friends church again. And maybe visit some others in the area. I like seeing how other people do things, but I don’t want to be a spiritual gypsy for too long.

My garden helpers

It’s not easy to find time to tend the garden with two little ones. Or do any singular activity, for that matter. They like to be involved.

Our backyard, tiny as it is, is now strewn with kids toys. The turtle sand box, basketball hoop, water table, little slide and see-saw. I love it, honestly. It makes me happy to look out the back window and see all those things for them to play with. We can’t fit a swing set back there, so we do what we can with what we have.

Even with the toys, the lure of What Mummy’s Doing is too strong. Inevitably, I get interrupted with “help,” often in the form of digging in inappropriate places — such as where things are growing. Duncan, at least, has learned the boundaries of the vegetable garden and walks along the pavers, but not in the soil. Berry caught on quickly this year, but occasionally manages to somehow fall into my garden beds and took out a pepper plant earlier this summer.

One form of “help” we’ve found that they both enthusiastically get into is watering the garden. We collect rainwater from our garage roof in plastic tubs. Kevin has grand ideas about building a water barrel, but so far we’re just using totes with lids and it’s working well.

The kids love filling up watering cans (or at least pretending to in Berry’s case) and watering the vegetables. Duncan likes watering one particular square foot of the garden which quickly turns into a mud puddle. It doesn’t seem to matter how many times I tell him it’s had enough water already, sooner or later he returns to that spot and sploshes some more on.

Explaining that the garden doesn’t need watering when it’s just rained - and everything is clearly still wet - also falls on deaf ears. It’s just too much fun. Why wouldn’t the plants want another drink? It tickles them, after all. I love him.

So here’s some shots (with my cell phone) of the two of them helping out. I will say that their participation is helpful when getting them to eat veggies at dinner. By watering them, Duncan has buy in. I mean, they’re HIS veggies. Why not eat them. I even got him to eat a raw green bean the other day - and he liked it!

Keeping birthdays naturally colored

I had so much fun at Duncan’s birthday party that - as exhausted as I was - I had a hard time falling asleep last night. This morning, even though Kevin has Berry downstairs and Duncan is still sleeping, I can’t get back to sleep for thinking about it.

All considered, everything went well. It rained practically all day, then stopped for 1hour and 55 minutes of the party. Pouring recommenced at 5:55 p.m. But it worked out OK as almost all the kiddos left, a few people and family stayed and we opened presents. Opening presents took an entire hour. Were there a lot of presents? Yes. Was he totally focused on thoroughly playing with the present he’d just opened, showing no interest in opening the next one? Totally. Bless him.

So Duncan is now 3 years old. Both he and Berry have a love of the Little Einsteins TV show, so we decided to use that a theme this year. In prior years (both of them) we went for a small, family party with “birthday” as the theme. But, as Kevin says, “you’re only 3 once.”

To go with the Little Einsteins table cover, plates, napkins, party hats and balloons I decided to make a Rocket cake. There were several obstables to that.

1. Um…a cake that’s not just round? That defies my cake making abilities.

2. How do I get red and blue icing without using Red No. 40? Artificial food coloring is banned in this house (along with MSG, artificial sweetners, high fructose corn syrup and hydrogenated oil *).

So Kevin and I (mostly Kevin) set about experimenting with natural food colors. For Berry’s birthday, I found a bottle of natural food coloring at a local health food store.

Seelect 100% Natural Food Coloring, Red/Strawberry, 2-Ounce Bottle (Pack of 4)

But it didn’t turn the icing strawberry red. It make it…well…kinda purple-y red. The cake was good, anyway.

For Rocket, I wanted RED red.

First Kevin tried boiling down some rhubarb from our garden. Then he added lemon juice to…um…change it from a base to an acid or something. There was an actual scientific principle at play.

(Must pause here, Duncan has woken up.)

Rhubarb made a pink color. Rhubarb + lemon juice made an orange-y pink color. Crushed cherries made a nice dark red shade — but cherry red (duh!), not Rocket red.

Next I tried melting and reducing a strawberry fruit pop. According to the ingredients, those are colored with the strawberries themselves, beet color and turmeric. I guess the yellow of the turmeric is supposed to turn the purpleness of the beet color into red. In any case, boiled down a bit it turned into a murky brownish orange. Not something I want to frost a cake with.

Finally, I decided to simply puree some strawberries. Mmmm…a nice red at last. Unfortunately, when mixed into dairy-free buttercream icing (earth balance margarine instead of butter), it turned a lovely shade of pink. Since it had a bit of an orange tinge, I added our red-purple natural food dye. It darkened it up a bit, but remained quite pink. The icing was also a bit soft.

The blue (for the windows and belly) was fairly easy to figure out. Crushed blueberries. I can’t remember if Kevin cooked them a bit first. Then he added baking power (or soda) — again to do something chemtastically scientific with the adic/base composition. It made a nice light blue/grey.

To actually make the Rocket cake, I found these instructions online (they’re down at the bottom of the page). I went one step further and made a bottom for Rocket as well. Since I wasn’t about to buy Twinkies, I used some extra cake for the engines.

And here it is - the edible, melting, pink finished product. Not as good as the creations on Andrea’s Recipes (her husband made it, no less), but did I mention that it was edible?

* Disclaimer: there are some MSG-containing soups in our pantry, but I will not be buying any more after a recent declaration (I believe I proclaimed: MSG is evil! at the dining room table). Kevin still drinks soda. Ugh. And, occassionally, we eat foods with hydrogentated oil, but as little as possible.

Contests, kids, yada yada

I’ve been swamped with work lately. I’m not complaining. Although I don’t want to be doing it on a Saturday afternoon.

The kids are great. Duncan got in a super pre-school (super education and super expensive). So lots of work couldn’t come at a better time. Looks like we’ll be staying in Rochester for a while.

Berry will be ONE next week.  I’m making a strawberry-flavored cake. I found natural red food coloring and strawberry flavoring at the natural foods store this morning, so I’m really happy about that. No Red Dye No. 4 for us! (is it 4? or 2? or 5? who knows, we just don’t eat it)

A quick link to the Safer Landing Blog. They write about safer gear and baby news. They’ve got a contest going for BPA-free feeding stuff.  I’m always up for a contest. And keeping the kids safe.

My tea is cosy

I’m not sure how we found the pattern. I think I was looking for strawberry images to use to make a Christmas tree ornament for Berry. Yes, we’re like that. We found some faux-Robeez in Target with strawberries on them and we were delighted to buy them for her. We’re going to do it until she’s old enough to protest.

Anyway. So I was looking for strawberry clip art/line drawings. And I found a pattern for a strawberry tea cosy. I had to have it. But I don’t knit.

Fortunately, I’m related to one of the world’s most fantastic knitters. (Ah, flattery, flattery. It works on my Mum.)

I got this in the mail today. It deserves the humongo-sized photo treatment.

Just looking at it makes me happy.

Kevin gave me the awesome tea pot for Christmas. It’s a Made in England traditional Brown Betty. And it holds 8 cups of tea. I drink a pot every day.

Now my tea is cozy.

And we’re not alone in wanting to cover Berry with fruits. In the card Mum sent with the tea cozy she wrote, “P.S. What do you think about making one as a rather cute winter hat for Berry?”

Trying to be green AND clean

Why does being green have to be so damn difficult and expensive? It seems every other person is “going green” yet it still costs more to do things that are healthy for your family and the planet.

I fell in love with the Swiffer WetJet a few months ago. I got a “green” recipe for floor cleaner (white vinegar, natural soap, grapefruit seed oil and hot water), jimmied open the cap on the cleaner container and poured out the horribly smelly stuff it came with and mopped away. Even Duncan loves mopping now.

I could be extra-green and use washable pads, but they make it a lot harder to mop and our baby sitter doesn’t like them. And, let’s be honest, she does most of the mopping.

I thought I had a good thing going. My green cleaner costs next to nothing and the floors were getting mopped several times a week.

Then, tonight, I decided to haul out the big old mop and Murphy’s Oil Soap as between 2 kids, a cat, us and several winters, the floors are getting banged up. They’re never shiny any more.

I was saddened and horrified to find out the floors are filthy. The mop water was black. Ugh. No wonder those white pants Berry wore the other day were totally dirty down the front. I thought our floors were cleaner than that.

So is it the Swiffer mop (which now has a leak in it - possibly due to bottle cap tampering)? Is it my floor cleaning juice? Is it just the difference between cleaning something with a wet wipe and with a nice, wet washcloth in the bathtub? I know my kids come out cleaner from the bathtub/washcloth application than a baby wipe.

Whatever the reason, it sucks. I’m not a huge fan of cleaning. It doesn’t last long enough. But to clean and not really get things clean? How disheartening.

Food, “glorious” food

A decade ago (or more) I got interested in pesticides in food. I read Diet for a Poisoned Planet: How to Choose Safe Foods for You and Your Family and made some changes to what I eat and how I think about food.

One of the things that struck me was reading about how children can be harmed by pesticide residues in fruits and vegetables–and that the harm outweighed the benefits of eating them. That blew me away.

Now I have 2 children. I think about these things even more.

I was looking to see if there was an updated version, and there is. I haven’t bought it yet, though. Why? 2 reasons:

I don’t have much time to read.

I’m scared to find out what it says.

When Duncan was a baby, he got only organic food. It’s easy to feed kids organic baby food. But as he started eating what we eat…well, we don’t eat organic all of the time. It’s the same with Berry. And it troubles me.

The Environmental Working Group has info about what fruits and veggies are best and worst when it comes to pesticide residues. But what I loved about the Diet for a Poisoned Planet book is that it also talked about the effect of canning and freezing on food. In some cases, it helped remove pesticides (for example, from the peel of pears), making them OK.

So it’s on my wish list. Maybe I’ll get it for myself once I’ve finished A New Earth.

Finding balance

I have the best life.

I complain a lot to my online mommy friends that I need to quit chatting and get working. Really I’m only “complaining” because I like talking to people. In an office environment, I’d spend some time talking to my co-workers about their lives and things we read in the paper and discuss what our lunch options were. I don’t have co-workers anymore. There’s a lot of things I don’t miss about that. Even the chatting sometimes, when I want to concentrate on getting that work done.

Because I love working. Specifically, I like the work I’m doing now. I feel like I’m making a difference, having positive effect on the world. I love that my clients are chiropractors, pediatricians practicing homeopathy, Adirondack meditation retreats, Reiki practitioners, new-age stores and the like. It’s totally up my alley.

I also appreciate that my “coworkers” are a couple of little people who hang out downstairs with their Daddy in the mornings. Activities include strenuous hours of play-dough creations, coloring, going outside to play basketball (thanks for the hoop, Nanny!) and some time singing and patting with Rocket and Little Einsteins.

When I’m ready for my coffee break (occurring right now), I’m greeted by Duncan yelling, “Oh! Mummy!” as I walk down the stairs. And I saw Berry roll from her back to front for the first time just now. She just turned 5 months old and I feel like I’ve been able to spend so much time with her, watching her slowly grow and change.

There are days I feel like I don’t see the kids much — when I work all morning, make lunch, put them down for naps, then back to work until the sitter gets here. Then more work until a half-hour before bath time. I get a lot of hours in some days. But it’s not every day.

And there’s still the, uh, joy of spending 2 hours in the morning (that’d be between the hours of 6 a.m. and 8 a.m.) before Kevin gets home from work. I actually enjoy the morning time we have together, even through the early morning summoning and the daily Battle of Breakfast.

Even today, when I have a cold and am having trouble concentrating, I feel like my life has a nice balance. I can breathe freely. I know things are on a positive course. And I’m surrounded by the things that are most important to me - meaningful work and family.